Somebody -
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should
have been more specific. - Jane Wagner
Experience -
Experience is that marvellous thing that enables you recognise a
mistake when you make it again. - F. P. Jones
Use of force ... -
The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is
generally employed only by small children and large nations. - David
Friedman
Wrong train ...
You spend your whole life believing that you're on the right track,
only to discover that you're on the wrong train
Pants on
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to
get its pants on. - Sir Winston Churchill
In bed -
Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns
The Final Masterpiece
Sure God created man before woman.. but then you always make a rough
draft before The Final Masterpiece.
Vegetarian ...
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian
because I hate plants. - A. Whitney Brown
Better lawyer -
A jury consists of twelve people who determine which client has the
better lawyer. - Robert Frost
Question and Answer
Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex
raises some pretty good questions. - Woody Allen
Not sure ...
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and
I'm not sure about the former.
Biggest mistake -
The biggest mistake people make in life is not trying to make a living
at doing what they most enjoy. - Malcomb S. Forbes
Nothing ...
Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving
his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental
attitude. - Thomas Jefferson
Happiness??
Happiness is inward, and not outward; and so, it does not depend on
what we have, but on what we are. - Henry Van Dyke
Happiness never decreases (wow) -
Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life
of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being
shared. - Buddha
Blessed ...
Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never
cease to be entertained. - John Powell
Dont be afraid.....
Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, Some achieve
greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them. - William Shakespeare
Victory ...
All people have fears, but the brave put down their fears and go
forward, sometimes to death, but always to victory.
Misc. SMS Quotes -
I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow
isn't looking good either.
It's no accident that stressed spelled backwards is desserts.
I wonder if you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Just because you're paranoid, it doesn't mean they're NOT out to get you.
You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.
I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
My Reality Check bounced.
Minds are like Parachutes. They work best when open.
Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will whiz on
your computer.
Lightyears ahead! Just a phonecall away!
Very funny Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.
Do chickens think rubber humans are funny?
There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule is already full.
Borrow money from pessimists--they don't expect it back
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.
What do you call a handcuffed man?
- Trustworthy.
